I Thought I Was Moving Forward and Lost It

What pieces or projects have you been working on lately?
Although photography is an essential part of my creative self — along with literature, even though I’ve neglected it quite a bit — I don’t really work on projects. Every day I go out like an idiot dragging a camera with me — figuratively, because I take better care of them than I do of myself. If something crosses my path and it’s worth it, I photograph it. I’m not looking for perfect compositions, angles, or polished technique. My photographer self, unlike my writer self, emerged from the need for people to see what I see and how I see it: situations, emotions, people.

If I had to speak of a “project,” it would be my life and my surroundings. I fucking love street photography; however, lately I’ve focused on portraying the people around me: my friends who are there for me during sleepless nights, my parents, my siblings, me drunk.

My project is me. Seeing myself through my lens: my passions, fears, anxieties, pain, love. Feeling that if I don’t portray it, if I don’t capture it with the camera, it will be as if it never happened, as if it didn’t exist or didn’t carry the importance it holds. Many of my photos are self-portraits: how I see a child, a man, or a dog. Everything is me and what I admire and imprint onto the subject.

What did you learn (or unlearn) while working on them?
What a day-to-day looks like — or roll to roll — because the pretentious asshole that I am only shoots analog. I’ve learned to take the camera out of my hands when I start drinking. That’s because I’ve had rolls developed with three disgusting photos of a beer or my kitchen. Unfortunately, I throw away those shots that aren’t even in focus and have no value. So I’ve learned — even if it doesn’t seem like it — to save film. I shoot as if rolls were free and then find myself eating instant noodles just to make it to payday.

Something I unlearned was composition. I started giving myself more freedom: focusing in ways I know aren’t 100% pleasing to the eye, but that make me feel they’re gazes anyone could have at some point. Obviously, in many ways I’m a snob, since I tend to be very purist about the rolls I use; yet at the same time I try — not always successfully — not to do the same thing all the time.

What words, ideas or emotions were going through your head?
Chaos, anger, love, anxiety, affection, tenderness, loneliness, peace, pain, happiness, moments, photos, words, beer, insomnia.

Were there any conversations, movies, music, or books that made their way into that work?
Music is central to my creative self. My mood depends on what I’m listening to. When I used to write more, I’d do it listening to punk or hard rock until two or three in the morning. Now that I’ve focused more on photography, going out with headphones listening, for example, to Kendrick Lamar makes me feel more contemplative and even direct. Music gives me a confidence I wouldn’t have without it in my ears.

As for films, Almost Famous (2000) reminds me of someone and of myself. It fills me with affection and love; it’s a longing for something I would have liked to live through at some point.

For books I have an unreal love for Rafa Saavedra that sometimes makes me want, when it comes to lights or concerts, to emulate that ecstatic feeling I find in his short stories and chronicles.

And finally, a conversation. It’s incredibly hard for me to be vulnerable with people, even with my therapist. But recently, a conversation that ended with “I’m very sorry you went through that” first gave me the strength to get through that week and later the certainty that sometimes the shit we throw at ourselves should be less.

What's been the most difficult thing you've faced recently in your creative process?
Myself. I’m my own worst enemy. My own worst critic. It’s rare for me to genuinely like what I do. I don’t know if the problem is that I’m too hard on my work or that I think no matter what I do, someone will always be able to do it better. But in an attempt to perpetuate the absurd, I keep doing it anyway, because I can. I can keep taking photos and, no matter how bad I might feel, I still find meaning in them. A meaning that, of course, doesn’t come with self-recognition.

What is your favorite restaurant and what do you recommend we order?
It’s hard, because for me food meets certain mood, sobriety, or craving parameters. So I’ll dare to recommend a few.

First, ramen: Wan Wan Sakaba in Juárez. It’s Japanese food, but whenever I go I order the same thing: Tan Tan Ramen with thick noodles, along with a Sapporo. It never fails.

Now, birria, my favorite broth. I’ve tried several and there are two that are my favorites, but over the past year, because it’s close to my house, I go more often to one. I’ve gone sober, dizzy, very drunk, and I always enjoy it. Birria Don Chuy in Guerrero. Like all good things, it’s open 24 hours. My combo every time: a plate of birria, a cheese quesadilla, and a beer. Top tier.

Then tacos. What would a chilango be without choricera tacos? I won’t recommend anything from the Roma-Condesa spectrum. I’ll go closer to the airport, to the neighborhood where I was born and where a few guys woke up with ice picks in their bellybuttons: Tascos Pascual in Malinche, near Eduardo Molina metro. MY ultimate tacos. I’ve arrived by bike, already half buzzed, to eat campechano, lengua, tripe, or pastor. They’ve never failed me. When I say they’re MY tacos, it’s because I’ve only taken one person there outside my family. I don’t think I’ll take anyone else anytime soon.

Those three are my favorites. Obviously I’m missing others, like the chicken broths from the R1 in San Agustín, Ecatepec. If you ever go, I recommend the breast quarter with everything: onion, chile piquín, lime, and a bolillo. You can’t go wrong. You won’t find better broths, and I doubt you’ll see them on TikTok.

If your life were a movie this month, what would it be called and who would write the soundtrack?
It’s January, it’s 2026. New life and close to my birthday… The film would be called I Thought I Was Moving Forward and Lost It. The soundtrack would be by Kendrick Lamar and Juan Gabriel. Gurus and prophets of my life.

Recommend one or more artists you follow who inspire you, and tell us what you like most about their work or their way of working.
I admire and will always admire Pascal’swork. She is the highest point I aspire to as a person and artist. Then Lina. Her art is raw and absurdly honest; you feel pain, ecstasy, sadness, happiness. It’s everything — pure power. And finally, Enrique Barbabosa, a deeply beautiful photographer.