Well, I saw your fucking mug on Facebook and it was worth it.
I know, I know...I wasn't cool with you. I lied to you, I used you, I half fucked you and I answered your messages and calls whenever I felt like it.
You weren't a saint either. I know you were looking for me just to have sex and for me to stick my tongue in your mouth the way you liked it.
We were both whores, in our drunken moments we would grope each other and we were even caught in your truck. We were never interested in talking about our families. We were just there for the moment. Maybe those eight years of difference between us created a wall that neither of us wanted to break down and it was the right thing to do, because we never got together to get ice cream or go to the movies.
We always met at night, drinking, smoking, sharing tastes and satisfying pleasures. Sometimes I regretted contacting you, several times you bored me and I managed to get you to stay away. I would come back to you because I was horny, because I felt like continuing the party, because I needed you to take me home, because I wanted a cigarette (which you never lacked), because I was bored or simply because I couldn't sleep.
I guess it was the same for you. You were horny and it amused me. You touched me like you wouldn't see me for months. When you told me you wanted to lick me all over, I got wet right away. Your tongue always felt desperate. You wanted things fast but with that sensuality that makes the moment more pleasurable. Sometimes I would open my eyes while we were kissing to see your expressions and I knew that's why you were a writer. I liked to say childish or exaggerated things to get to know your morbidness and you never made fun or got angry, I liked that you played along.
We are not responsible for those nights as they were made up of fantasies and we never hurt others. Any day we may meet on the street and hopefully the same story will not repeat itself. With a mocking laughter we'll see each other and then we'll go our separate ways.
Photography by Denis Ryabov
I want to have a cup of coffee with everyone and have a good talk while playing music on my cell phone.